'Tis The Season

13 days until Christmas...the countdown is underway. I am so in the Christmas spirit. I love this time of year. Em and I have managed to not be too busy either, which has made things even more enjoyable. The best is that Christmas shopping is done and I didn't over spend. I am just content with life, no stress, no unreasonable expectations, and plans to just enjoy my friends and family. Thank you God for Christmas! This year is truly showing me what Christmas is all about.

Advent

Yup, that time of year has arrived...the precurser to winter...fall. OK, so it has been here for a few weeks, but the weather was nice so I ignored it! Today, the wind is whipping around and my walnut tree is naked(which means more raking on my behalf). The stores are showing off their latest Christmas junk that they eagerly want us to buy. I want to use this next few weeks to think about Advent.

I am inspired by the Advent Conspiracy. Thanks to a couple of friends on Facebook, I was able to connect to their web page: www.adventconspiracy.org. There I discovered a movement that totally fits in with my desire to waste less money and help others more. It is worth looking into! Their ministry is to reconnect relationally at Christmas...spend less time in stores, spend less money, make gifts, spend time together. And then....here is the kicker...give the money you save to help the less fortunate! What a concept....well at least for the gimme, gimme folks out there.

My attempt to curb gifts this year has already begun. I have been making Emma make a Christmas list. She will only be getting two gifts off that list, or only one if it is more costly. She doesn't need more stuff, and she is old enough to learn that other people in the world are hurting and need basic things such a water and food. She can be a part of the solution by giving up toys!

I hope anyone reading this blog checks out the Advent Conspiracy website and becomes inspired as well.

God Bless

Striving to Be More Thankful

I had my "a-ha" moment in church this week. It was a tough week, Emma getting in trouble at daycare and written up twice. I was tired and struggling to figure out what was going on with her. She wasn't any different at home, in fact she had been behaving really well at home. On Sunday, I got to church just feeling weary. I was not looking forward to the next week, nervous that there would still be trouble at daycare, and not really "feeling" the worship service. Then it happened...communion. I started crying, and felt as though God was saying, "You get to start over every time you screw up, so why can't Emma?" I had to let go of my anger towards her behavior at daycare and start over. Emma and I shared communion together and it was lovely. I think the thing I left out of my week was thanking God for the good in my life. I made a short list at church.

I am thankful for: 1. A little girl with lots of spunk! 2. A chance to influence a life! I checked my bad attitude and began to focus on the good...what a difference that little act can do.

Kibogora, Rwanda

I am so psyched about my church's upcoming mission's trip to Rwanda...I want to go so bad. Unfortunately, being a single parent to a four year old, I probably can't this time, but oh, oh, oh...I want to go! I even casually mentioned it to my ex-husband, just to see if there would be any offer of: "I could keep Emma" but his response was of course just his normal negative response that the US is always helping others only to have those that are helped come over and kill us...such a uplifting person he is!

The piece of the trip that has me so excited is the week at Kibogora Hospital. This was a place that my cousin worked at as a missionary surgeon for many years, so I remember hearing updates at church as a kid. It would also be a place where I could use my training and make a BIG difference...and perhaps be talked into performing other tasks that I wouldn't here!(you never know if they might need a hand in surgery!) My friend Jenn told me that there is a new initiative in the medical missions world to enhance and train people in the principles of physical therapy...what a lasting gift! What a purpose! I would love to to that!

I definitely need to pray about this...this might not be the trip for me, but I trust that other opportunities will come up once Emma is older that will allow me to experience something like this. My two big concerns would be if something happened to me while I was gone, then Emma would be without her mom(yikes!, although, God would look after her, I know this in my heart, but my head says YIKES!), and once I meet those with nothing, help them, and then come back to the US and treat the selfish babies that want everything for nothing, I might quit my job and move to Africa!!!!!

Could It Have Been Any Easier?

I am quite frustrated today...why? Today was the day that I was delivering donations for the Ronald McDonald House in our community. Donations of paper towels and grab and go size snacks. Our department was collecting a donation as a part of PT month. I am so angry because in a department with almost 40 therapists, all making a decent salary...only a quarter participated. We only dropped off 12 things...and I know that I brought in two of them as did one other therapist. I just can't believe that others in our department could not afford a few dollars for some snacks or a couple of rolls of paper towels. They don't seem to have a problem getting new vehicles, nice phones, or travelling...I am ranting. The people at the RMH were so happy to get the little that we brought! That did make my day...I just wish we could have been more giving as a department...it really showed me where people's hearts are.

Finding Your "Spot"

I have always struggled with "what to do" when it comes to ministry. I naturally was drawn to working with children. Was is because I was supremely gifted in this area? Was it just because I liked kids? Or maybe, kids don't judge like grown ups...the expectations on their behalf is just not the same...the acceptance and room for error is just different. For the most part, they just want your attention and love.

Now that I think about it, this "attention and love" is probably all that the adults need as well. We just complicate it all by desiring things to be "perfect" and flashy. We are the stupid ones...the kids have gotten it right!

A Thankful Friday

Whew, what a week...a sick kid, busy schedule, it all seems to add up so fast. I do have to say that my mindset has been positive throughout the days and nights that I was dealing with Emma's illness. I also have been so thankful for our health and for her ability to not be cranky and unbearable when she is ill.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about why we all should be more thankful. It makes it so much easier to appreciate everything in my own life. The only unfortunate part is that I really notice those walking the opposite path of ingratitude and selfishness, but I think this is only the beginning! I am getting excited and less dispondent about what I need to do and more patient regarding allowing God to show me where I should go and what He has planned for me...the best is yet to come!

Encouragement

Today was a different Sunday. To begin, we had church at Ontario Beach park. Another congregation was also meeting at the pavilion right next to ours, so we combined services...it was kinda cool and so spontaneous. The pastors had met a couple of months ago and had talked about having a joint service at some point, but it was just a "coincidence" that we were at the same park on the same Sunday. Their congregation was racially diverse, just like ours. It was kinda neat.

This evening I attended the Foundation of Hope prayer service. It was amazing. I wish I could understand that words that were being sung. Heritage does interpret as much as possible, and he did preach in English. The people involved are just so loving and wonderful. I feel adopted into their family already and they don't even know me yet. They are encouraging. Both Heritage and Prudence offered to help me in any way, and if they could not help, they would pray for me and love me. One of the other members wanted to know if I would be travelling with them to Albany to minister with them next weekend!!! I just met these people and they are including me in all aspects of their lives. Prudence was excited that now that his family is moving to Greece that we will be neighbors! I think I am going to like getting to know these people. What a display of putting others first....remember, the dozen Africans are the ones reaching out to us, the Americans(or Canadians!), not the other way around...we should be the ones helping them, encouraging them. They left everything behind them when they left Africa...some of them even left their family there. Now, here they are in America, the land of opportunity, and they are encouraging us to love more, pray more, listen to God's voice more.

By the way, Heritage wants to be a missionary to Africa! I think that is so neat since I would consider him a missionary from Africa to America. But, his heart is for Africa...he is a great missionary already, so I am sure that once he returns to Africa he will do amazing work in God's name.

Time To Redirect

So, after four days trapped in my home with a sick child, it has been very hard to not become self-centered again. I kept thinking about how hard this was on me...how bored I was...and of course, how hungry I was. Not only did I make rice crispy treats(for church picnic tomorrow), I ate enough "bad" food to make me feel guilty.

I spoke with several friends last week and was surprised at the response to my original blog. Each person has a different take on making a less self-centered approach to living life. My sister-in-law suggested throwing a block party for my neighbors. Unfortunately, that is something that already happens in my neighborhood! Another friend encouraged me to just be the best listener to those who cross my path, thus allowing them the privilege to talk and be heard. My small group helped me think of things that I am passionate about, which unfortunately wasn't much, at least off the top of my head, but I has me thinking about it.

All in all, this week has been disrupted by a change of health in my household, thankfully only for the short term. I am looking forward to church tomorrow, and being out of the house for more than an hour at a time. I was to get my mind back on track and thinking about what my goal is for this season, which is discovering a way to impact my community in a positive way. I need to combine it with something that I am passionate about....I am still thinking....who knows, maybe it will come to me while I lay awaiting sleep to come....

Our County's Finest

Today after work, I drove my friend downtown, literally, to the Sheriff's office so she could be fingerprinted...no, not for committing crimes, but for a new job! In order to enter the building, we had to walk past the "visitors" who were shouting back and forth with the "residents" at our county jail. At first I was nervous, but I guess a safe place to be would be near the jail, right??? But, much to my surprise, I really felt very sad. I felt sad because so many men in our community have made so many bad choices. What happens next for them? Is there change? Do they care? I want them to care. This emotion startled me, because I know that usually I would primarily think about how fortunate we are to have these "bad" people locked up. I would be quick to pass judgement and forget about them.

So once again I am faced with the question of what can I do to make a difference in my community, or in a community where boys grow up too fast, trying to be men but with no role models to teach them how to be real men. Where do I begin? I don't know...I really don't know. But...I want to find my starting line and maybe begin with a brisk walk, eventually working my way to a steady jog, pacing myself, taking breaks when I need to, but willing to go the distance to help one, two, or who knows how many people in the process.

I Have to Start with Me

I will be the first to admit that I am not a writer. In fact, much of the time I struggle to put to words what goes on in my head...at least in the way I want it to be communicated. But, I think I need to document the journey that I want to embark on...I want to really make a lifestyle change, a character change...and at the same time hopefully touch other people's lives.





The inspiration for my quest began when I entered what is now my church home and found myself in the midst of families that had lost everything, but were joyfully praising God for what they had. These families are refugees from the Congo, who have witnesses genocide, had times where they had no food, lost family and friends, and homes. I listened to Heritage preach this morning, and he is so thankful for life and God's love and provision. His eyes sparkle and his smile lights up the room. He shouts for joy! He and his family dance with praise! They get it...they really get what life is about. I am ashamed when I am a part of the opposite here in the US....I take, I spend my money on useless things, I eat until my belly hurts.



Now, what am I going to do? I don't quite know yet...but this is why I want to write about my challenge to myself and hope that in a years time I will be able to show a journey of transformation from a self-serving individual to someone who gives without seeking anything in return. I know that I will need to pick the brains of my pastors, friends, and maybe even strangers that I meet along the way, but I am excited to see what might be around the corner. I am excited to see what relationships will form along the way!